My friend Mike D (of Ticket Poetry fame) and I were discussing some of our old Gmail chats, and I thought this one was funny enough to post.
(please keep in mind that it was pretty late in the evening when we wrote this)
me
call out the st. bernards. tell them it’s a code mauve
Mike
we may have to awaken the Great Orangatan
me
oh great. I hope he’s had his shots this time
Mike
yes. all forty two of them
me
wow. so he must be grumpy. I know I am when I’ve had my 42 shots
Mike: yeah
I’m listening to Horowitz play Prokofiev. and the marmosets are dancing
me
I had killer hiccups earlier today and I was stranded in my car because of a lightning storm and I couldn’t get to any water and I had like 20 minutes of straight hiccupping and now I’m exhausted.
Mike
wow. you could probably be in a Reader’s Digest Drama in Real Life: “Hiccups on the Highway”
me
I’m sure people would be inspired
Mike
with like this scary picture of a lone car with lightening all around it and a picture of you emerging from your car after the storm looking pale and wan
we can do the pale and wan in makeup
we can’t do the storm in makeup though
me
and the horror of getting to my destination and not being able to find a water fountain and thus having to pay a dollar for a bottle of water because I was desperate! But the cashier was nice. I think he took pity on my hiccupping self. we can do horror makeup for that part
Mike
I’ll interview him. he’ll get a thumbnail picture
[Somehow this transitioned into a discussion of classical sequels, including:]
Mike
and you could tell them about my hit new musical
Les Miserables II: The Inexplicable Return of Javert
me
Hamlet II: All the Main Characters Are Still Dead
Mike
and The Sound of Music II: The Hills Are Still Alive
me
La Boheme II: Everyone is Still Depressed, and Still Very French
Mike
Much Ado about Nothing II: Still More Ado About Less Than Nothing
me
Titus Andronicus II: Don’t Even Go There
Mike
Rigoletto II: Never Mind–Just When You Thought it Couldn’t Get More Depressing
me
Turandot II: Turns Out She’s Still Mean, Plus Obnoxious to Live With
Mike
Great Expectations II: Realistic Expectations
me
Cats II: More People Dressed Up Like Cats